Failing a class isn’t the end of the world, but it’s important to determine whether the failure is an isolated screw-up or a symptom of a broader academic struggle. Either way, the problem needs to be addressed.
- Is failing a class a rare event for your teen? Maybe he or she didn’t study hard enough or missed a key assignment. Treat the failure as a life lesson and let him or her take responsibility for it. Your child should talk to the teacher and the guidance counselor to find out how to make up the material or patch up his or her grade point average. Just make sure your teen does something. If you go attend these sessions, let your child do the talking.
- What are your teen’s goals (to graduate, make money, learn a skill, go to college)? Help him or her articulate them. What can your kid do to attain them? What’s holding him or her back (lack of discipline, impulsiveness, boredom, feeling overwhelmed academically)?
- What’s the big picture? If your teen is struggling academically, talk with the teacher first to find out why he or she failed, and then talk with the school administration and guidance counselor. Would another educational approach, such as a tech school or magnet school, be more appropriate for his or her interests, ability, and learning style? Would tutoring help? To find out if your qualify for free tutoring, read “Public School Policy: No Child Left Behind Offers Free Tutoring to Some Students.”
- What else is going on in your teen’s life? A temporary drop in grades often follows a move or transition to high school. To help your child make a smooth transition, read “Parent Involvement Essential to Successful Middle School Transition to High School.”
- Other life events, such as parental divorce, death of a friend or family member, or breaking up with a girl- or boyfriend, can distract a student from school. Monitor your child’s grades and school attendance to make sure the drop is temporary. A student should begin improving after a semester. Much longer, and teens risk falling too far behind or inflicting too much damage to their grade point averages to recover.
- Do you need to adjust your parenting style to meet your teen’s needs? If you tend to be relaxed about rules and boundaries, try tightening up. Impose a curfew on school nights or turn off the TV and the Internet until homework is done. Review homework every night or at the end of the week and touch base with teachers every week or two to make sure your kid is keeping up. On the other hand, if you tend to be rigid and anxious about your teen’s behavior, trying lightening up. While you need to make sure his or her grades improve, your kid needs to know that you recognize his or her strengths and achievements and that he or she has your love and approval no matter what.