By the time your child is a preschooler (3, 4 or 5 years old), he usually has the basic skills it takes to form friendships with others. But he may not know just how to go about making friends. That is where you come in. Parents can model friendship skills such as taking turns when you talk or play together, sharing what you have and inviting others to join activities.
Preschool manners are important
You can also coach your child as he tries to use these friendship skills with other children. First, give him opportunities to be with other children. This can also improve his child social development skills.
Second, give him words or phrases to use when he approaches other children. Suggest that he say “Do you want to play?” or “Do you want to see my book?” to invite others to join him in play. And when playtime is over, talk to him about what happened and how he felt about it. Often when we put our thoughts and feelings into words, it helps us remember an event and prepare for the next time.
What You Need
Quiet time with your child
Let’s Go!
After your child has spent some time playing with others, set aside a few moments to ask your child to tell you about how the playtime went. Here are some open-ended questions that will help.
- What did you play with?
- Tell me about the games you played.
- Who played with you?
- What part was the most fun?
- Was there anything you two did that you didn’t like? What was it?
- What would you like to play next time?