A major challenge for teenagers is balancing the many demands on their time—heavy student homework loads, family responsibility, extra-curricular activities, community service, a job, friendships. How can you help your teen balance commitments responsibly? Try some of these suggestions.
- Model balance. Do your best to achieve a balanced life. Demonstrate to your teen how you meet your commitments to your interests, work, family, friends, and community by planning ahead and setting priorities (See below). You might also identify and discuss potential role models, such as scholar athletes and teen volunteers, who balance various interests in their life successfully.
- Stay calm. When things get crazy, take a break. Even if the break lasts two minutes, being removed from the fray can make a big difference. What else helps? Deep breathing. Take several long, deep breaths to slow the heartbeat and get oxygen flowing through the bloodstream. Use these techniques yourself and also encourage your teenager to use them.
- Start the day right. Different people prefer different methods of waking up: some like a gentle nudge and some need reveille, but everyone benefits from a little extra time. Make sure everyone has a good breakfast. A nutritious breakfast can be as simple as a sliced orange and peanut butter toast or a fruit smoothie. Above all, don’t forget to tell your kids you love them, no matter how grumpy they may be in the morning.
- Help your teen set priorities. Have your child list all the activities of each day in a typical week, along with the approximate amount of time he or she spends on each activity. Check the list to make sure nothing was forgotten, for example, time spent on social networking sites, playing video games, or reading for pleasure. Then ask him or her to rank the activities from most to least important. Discuss the ranking. Make sure your teen understands that high school academics is priority number one and that student homework must take as much time as necessary to accomplish it well. Help your child realize that the time devoted to activities at the bottom of the priority list may have to decrease in order to spend more time on higher priority activities.
- Help your teen plan ahead. If your teen is not already using one, teach him or her how to use a planner or a calendar to schedule important deadlines and activities. Demonstrate how you use your planner, and work together to find one for your teen that is simple and enjoyable to use.
- Help your teen stay organized. Whether it is using to-do lists, keeping an Outlook calendar, using a spreadsheet, electronic alerts, or any other method, help your teenager find an organizational method that works. Consider setting up a reminder chart for the family that lists important tasks, appointments, and events.
- Make sure your teen resolves conflicting commitments. Before a teenager takes on a job or extracurricular activity, make sure he or she finds out when it takes place and how long it lasts. If the activity conflicts with a previous commitment, help your child figure out whether the conflict can be resolved and then communicate with everyone involved as soon as possible.