Your sweet baby has turned into a defiant teen, and you’re left wondering where the handbook for teenage discipline is. You ask yourself questions like these: Is there anything teens respect? Is there a trick when it comes to dealing with teenagers? Is this kind of aggression in children considered normal behavior? When is this disrespectful teenager's behavior going to end?
Is disrespectful behavior normal? Sometimes. Is it acceptable? No.
You can expect all defiant teens to be mouthy and grumpy sometimes. But how can you tell if your teen’s manners, or lack thereof, is “normal,” or if your kid has a more serious problem? Severe aggressive behavior in children can be a sign that your teen needs help from a professional. Here are ten warning signs that your teenager’s behavior may be cause for concern:
1. Your teen's behavior puts him or her or other family members in physical danger.
2. Your teen's behavior has become abnormal for her or him: sleeping too little or too long; hating what was once loved or loving what was once hated; avoiding friends or spending too much time with them.
3. Your teen is increasingly disrespectful, dishonest, or disobedient without any regard to the consequences.
4. Your teen completely ignores or rebels against the family rules.
5. Your teen makes outright or suggested threats of suicide, cuts or injures him- or herself, or takes excessive risks (physical, sexual, or by drug/alcohol use).
6. Your teen begins treating people or pets in a threatening manner. Physically harming animals is a sign of a serious problem.
7. Your teen thinks he or she is the center of your family, disregarding the feelings, time, or belongings of other family members.
8. Your teen has had months of counseling with little or no positive progress.
9. Your teen refuses to do anything with the family.
10. Your teen can’t stay away from friends who have destructive behavior and attitudes.
If your teenager has been exhibiting at least five of the behaviors described above for more than six months, contact a school counselor or principal, a teacher your child respects, your family doctor, or a professional therapist. If you have tried counseling and it isn’t working, ask for a referral to a different counselor. Trust your instincts—no one knows your child better than you do. If you need to, get help for both of you.
Sources:
sciencenewsforkids.org
www.4parents.gov
www.askdrsears.com
kidshealth.org
Barbara Rickard holds a B.S. from Michigan Technological University and is the mother of three children in elementary, middle, and high school. She has volunteered in the public schools for 10 years, including 4 as a PTA Board Member.