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avatarDMukar
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I do I direct leadership qualities in a 6 year old with a strong personality?

My 6 year old has strong leadership qualities that often get her in trouble with the school teacher and the principal. She likes to help, being more of an assistant but when she tries to help her behavior is considered disruptive and often filed under misconduct for not following directions. How do I channel those qualities and let her know the right time to demonstrate those qualities.

Question applies to ages: 6

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avatarElizabeth.Johns
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Top 5 in: Choosing College, Discipline, Families and Relationships, Family Activities, Growth and Development, Health and Wellness, Learning Disabilities and Special Needs, Learning Styles, Parents and Schools, Safety, School Policy and Education Issues, Study Skills and Academics, Summer Learning and Camps, Teens and Jobs, Transitions and Readiness, Motivating StudentsTop 5 in 16 Topics		 First, let me commend you for the positive way in which you describe your daughter's personality traits. Given your other question, I'm sure her teachers do not see her leadership qualities; rather they see bossiness and stubbornness. I think your way is better.

You are correct, though, that your daughter needs to learn how to channel her leadership qualities appropriately so that she doesn't continue to get in trouble with teachers and alienate fellow students.

I highly recommend the book "PArenting Your Spirited Child," by Mary Sheedy Kurcinka. It has lots of good advice on handling kids who have strong personalities. It's been ages since I've read it, though, so I can't pinpoint any one part of the book, I just remember it's very well written.

I might suggest giving her certain areas of leadership and responsibility at home, but also take some time to explain that in different situations, different people get to be the leader. At school, it's the teacher. At home, it's you. Perhaps you can play games where you take turns being the leader and giving directions--like Simon Says or Follow the Leader.

Good luck with your daughter.

References:
mom of four kids with vastly different personalities
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