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avatar Anonymous

how can i controll my 3 year old son?



Question applies to ages: 3

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avatarElizabeth.Johns
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Top 5 in: Choosing College, Discipline, Families and Relationships, Family Activities, Growth and Development, Health and Wellness, Learning Disabilities and Special Needs, Learning Styles, Parents and Schools, Safety, School Policy and Education Issues, Study Skills and Academics, Summer Learning and Camps, Teens and Jobs, Transitions and Readiness, Motivating StudentsTop 5 in 16 Topics		 Without knowing in what ways your son is out of control, it is difficult to offer an answer to you about how to control him.

I think at the toddler/pre-schooler stage, much of our job of parenting is not necessarily controlling our children, but teaching them how to control themselves. Through patient teaching and lots of repetition, we show them how to control their physical impulses, their emotions, and their desires.

Teaching your child to control himself ranges from things like using his indoor voice indoors, saying please and thank you, using words to express anger instead of hitting, and learning that you can't grab a toy away from a friend just because you want it right now. Sometimes that involves modeling the correct behavior and repeating it, and praising him when he does it.

At other times, such as during an angry outburst, it may mean physically holding him in your lap until he calms down. The message at that time may be, "until you are able to control yourself, I will have to control you. But I know that next time, you will do a better job because we are going to practice."

Another part of controlling your child's behavior involves being aware of the triggers that set him off, and either avoiding or diminishing those triggers. For most children (for most people, big or small), many of those triggers for "bad" or negative behavior can be summed up with the word, HALT. This stands for Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired. Does your son's negative behavior escalate in the hour before dinner? Maybe a healthy snack when you first walk in the door and 10 minutes of cuddle time to talk about your days will prevent a huge meltdown while you are making dinner. Planning a trip to the grocery store an hour before his nap time is probably a good recipe for an out-of-control child at the store. Better to wait until after nap, when he is refreshed.

If you'd like to write back with specific areas of concern, I could be more specific. I hope these general comments are of some help.

References:
Mom of four kids, who were all 3 at some point in their lives.
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avatarnew parent
# of Thumbs Up Received (0)		 You can't control them thats impossable but you can teach them respect by letting your no mean no and youre yes mean yes.And watch the show super nany it has been a sorce of help for me to prepare for when my child gets old enoph to talk and such.the noty spot is a good tool to use but you must remain constant and firm.

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super nany
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