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avatar Anonymous

How do I get my teen to talk to me more?



Question applies to ages: 18

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avatarLizInHolt
# of Thumbs Up Received (78)
Top 5 in: Career Training, Choosing College, Depression and Mental Health, Discipline, Families and Relationships, Health and Wellness, Home Learning and Field Trips, Learning Disabilities and Special Needs, Learning Styles, Manners and Values, Parenting Support, Parents and Schools, Safety, School Policy and Education Issues, Setting Goals and Getting Motivated, Study Skills and Academics, Transitions and Readiness, Students' Civil RightsTop 5 in 18 Topics		 Teens often avoid conversations with their parents. They feel their parents are being nosy or checking up on them. All of which, as a parent, you need to do! But there are ways to get around this. Ask questions that can't be answered with "Yes" or "No" or "Fine"....Instead of "how did school go today?" ask, "What did Mrs. So-and-So have you work on today in Language Arts class?" or "What's the best or worst thing that happened at school today?" In other words, ask questions that require an actual response and not just yes/no/fine/ok.

Ask your teen to teach you something - maybe it's how to use something on your computer, or how to upload a photo to your computer, or how to check the oil in the car. ANYthing that your teen knows how to do but you don't. Imagine a friend was teaching you the same thing and the questions you'd ask the friend - 'How did you learn how to do this?" "How many times did you have to do this before you got good at it?"

Kids want to be appreciated for who they are and for the things they know and are good at. Give your teen the chance to shine, to talk about what HE loves and is passionate about, not what you wish he was interested in.

Listening is the most important part of talking with a teen. Hear what he's saying and ask questions based on that, to show you're listening and are interested.

And don't be discouraged. Teens can be moody and grumpy, just like the rest of us. Keep trying!
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