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avatarJan
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My son is not motivated and he's a junior in high school

He has ADD not on medication, but forgets to do homework, loses things, doesn't seem to care. I need to find help motivating him.

Question applies to ages: 16

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avatarGeraldine
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Learning Disabilities and Special Needs # of Thumbs Up Received (3)		 Lack of motivation is not unanticipated for a teen, especially one with ADD. At his age, parents can help motivation by being part of a team approach and being supportive and understanding about the challenges and frustrations confronted on a daily basis. Part of the team can be a tutor, coach, peer helper, or teacher who provides the structure and support for homework and test taking. A personal relationship helps a teen with ADD to focus on the task, stick with it and get it done. Check with the teachers to ensure that your teen knows how to do the homework. He may need help in understanding or applying the knowledge covered in class or book.

References:
educational psychologist/academic couch for 20 years.
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avatarKathy
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Top 5 in: Depression and Mental Health, Home Learning and Field Trips, Learning Disabilities and Special NeedsTop 5 in 3 Topics		 I think junior high is tough for a lot of kids, especially boys because of the increased need for organization. They have so much more to take care of in junior high, there's the locker, (usually a mess), the locker combination, assignments for 6 or 7 different classes, different teachers, etc.
I guess I would suggest that you start by making small attainable goals for him and help him to be successful. For instance, you may just start with his planner. If he doesn't have a planner, then I would suggest you get him one. Alot of junior highs, now have planners for purchase at the school but if not you can get something almost anywhere that will be pretty inexpensive.
Ask him to enter assignment and test dates into his planner and keep this info always updated. I'll bet most of his teachers have personal web pages on the school website and all of the class assignment and test info will be right on it. Once he's doing well with this make sure you encourage him and celebrate his effort. As you go through his planner maybe daily and then moving to every few days or weekly, ask him how he did turning in last weeks assignments.
Then I would move on to turning in all assignments. I would try to ignore the desire to put expectations on grades or quality but just get him to turn the assignments in. I would impose sanctions like grounding, losing phone or computer time, or something else that is equally annoying to him, if he does not turn in his assignments on time.
Once you have formed the habit of being responsible in this way you can deal with the issue of improving the quality of the work. I'm sure this isn't always the case but I have found it to be common that the skills required to be successful academically are usually there, it is the ability to be productive, responsible and well-organized that are usually lacking.
I would also suggest that you include him in the discussion about what you will be expecting from him and what he can expect from you in return. You may consider writing these out in the form of a contract. This will help him to understand when he does receive consequences, especially negative ones that you are not overreacting or punishing him out of spite but that this is the agreed upon outcome of his actions. It will also help you to be consistent and it will help take some of the emotion out of the situation. I would also have a meeting with the school to discuss your plan with them and ask for their help as well.
Good luck. He's fortunate to have a parent who's paying attention.
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avatarLizInHolt
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Top 5 in: Career Training, Choosing College, Depression and Mental Health, Discipline, Families and Relationships, Health and Wellness, Home Learning and Field Trips, Learning Disabilities and Special Needs, Learning Styles, Manners and Values, Parenting Support, Parents and Schools, Safety, School Policy and Education Issues, Setting Goals and Getting Motivated, Study Skills and Academics, Transitions and Readiness, Students' Civil RightsTop 5 in 18 Topics		 There's a Guide in the Parent Library that may help, called Help My Teen Learn Study Skills. Check it out for some ideas you might use in helping your son. Click on "Library" in the blue bar at the top of this page, and then click on "Guides" and you'll find it.
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avatarParent of 3
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Top 5 in: Health and Wellness, Learning Disabilities and Special NeedsTop 5 in 2 Topics		 DO YOU HAVE MY CHILD!!!! I am sorry that I can not offer any advice at this time, but I wanted to let you know that you are not alone! I also have a son who is a junior in high school. He is also ADD and even though he IS on medication, we have not seen improvement with motivation. With college around the corner, I hope it clicks in fast or we will not feel comfortable sending him even though he has loads of potential. I hope someone out there can offer us both some help. We have been dealing with this for along time and I don't know what else to try.
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