It's nothing to be embarrassed about. Even the most level-headed parents lose their cool once in awhile. When you find yourself stressed out and about to blow up at your children, try these Stressed-Out Survival (S.O.S.) tips:
What To Do Now:
- Take a deep breath and regain some perspective. Although your son wore his muddy shoes into the house in spite of your reminder to leave them at the door, remember that dirt can be cleaned. The effects of hurtful words and out-of-control behavior last much longer than a muddy floor.
- Step into their shoes. Close your eyes. Pretend you are hearing what your child is about to hear if you blow up.
- Stop and play. Let the chores go, and simply enjoy your children's company for awhile. It won't take long before you remember why you do this job. Plus, they'll usually be better behaved once they have your attention.
- Change the scenery. If the weather permits, take everyone out for some fresh air. If that's not possible, change your routine. Eat ice cream out of the carton; read silly stories; invite everyone to a picnic supper under the table. Anything out of the ordinary will get your children's attention and lighten everyone's mood.
What To Do Later:
- Make time for yourself. Enlist the help of family or friends to allow you some time alone. All parents need time to themselves, to discover interests, enjoy friends, and just be alone. Taking care of yourself and meeting your own needs will make you a better parent. It also teaches your children valuable lessons about the importance of living a balanced life.
- Get some exercise. A simple walk can do wonders to relieve the stresses of life's responsibilities. Try to make exercise a part of each day.
- Consider waking up 30 minutes earlier than your children. This can provide some uninterrupted adult time to read the paper, read a book, write in a journal or exercise at home.
- Talk to someone who can help. If you often find it hard to manage your emotions, seek help from a caring friend, clergy or other professional.