What kinds of things can parents do to help children be conscious of equality between men and women in daily life and promote it within their families?
- Strive to parent equally, in consultation with each other. Not just who pays the bills, cleans house, takes out the trash or chauffeurs children. Pay attention to gender behavior -- does one parent do all the disciplining and one tend to the emotional needs? Share these and mix them up.
- Value all qualities equally, regardless of gender. Help girls learn decisiveness by asking them opinions about a problem. Give boys an avenue to connect with and express feelings by specifically asking about them.
- Be proactive about intercepting the messages and stereotypes that undermine development of gender-neutral ideas. Watch the TV shows your kids watch. Talk frankly about the gender stereotypes and social strategies they see. Challenge them to think critically about the media.
- Model skills of courtesy, good listening, and respect for each other as parents and extend these to your children.
- Approach household chores as fun family activities. Define together what must be done and match it to individuals' abilities and interests. Rotate tasks to build skills.
- Watch and talk together as a family about what you observe in the world every day. Look for concrete examples that illustrate gender equality. Count the women drivers in greeting cards with men and women in them; note how many women and men are grocery-shopping in each aisle.
- Encourage asking questions. Feelings and questions are vital tools for developing as a whole and balanced person.
Phyllis Edgerly Ring is a freelance writer in Exeter, NH.