Everywhere we turn, parents are encouraged to be more responsible for their children’s education. Most educators would agree this minimally means sending our children to school ready to learn with a good night’s rest and a belly full of breakfast.
Being responsible for our children’s education also means advocating for them when a problem occurs at school.
Whether it’s social violence on the playground or a poor classroom performance, parents can be more effective when they have a strategy -- rather than letting their emotions get the best of them.
Here are 10 simple steps for parents to follow when a problem arises at school:
- Define and examine your concerns.
Do your homework. It is critical to collect all the facts and articulate the problem clearly to be believable. Does this problem involve other children? If so, consider involving other parents in this process. There is credibility in numbers. - Develop possible solutions.
This sets a positive tone indicating you want to work in partnership with the school to resolve the problem. You’re not merely complaining, but offering potential solutions. - Prepare a written document.
To an extent, the education system has forced school personnel into the role of bureaucrats, and their language is paper. Having a written document makes the school take your concerns seriously. The document should contain a list of your issues, potential solutions and questions. The tone should reflect your desire to work positively with the school. - Meet with the teacher.
Make an appointment with the teacher. Consider having your spouse or a friend accompany you for support. Inform the teacher whom to expect at the meeting. - Approach the meeting with a positive attitude.
Leave your emotions outside the meeting room. Negative behavior will only discredit your message; your behavior must stay above reproach. Using your document as the basis for the meeting’s agenda, keep an open mind and don’t be afraid to ask questions. - Define the next step.
At the end of the meeting ask:
- Who will be responsible for that step?
- What is the date the next step occur?
This step is crucial; it keeps the meeting from being merely a gripe session and increases the likelihood of a positive outcome. Leave a copy of your written document with the teacher.
- Document events.
Keep a record of all meetings and phone calls including dates and people involved, along with your initial document and any letters. Politely informing the school you are documenting the events lets the school know you are serious. - Follow the chain of command.
If you and the teacher are unable to resolve the problem, go to the next link in the chain of command. Usually the chain of command looks like this: teacher, principal, superintendent, school board member. Use steps 1 through 7 with each person on the chain. - Consider all your educational options.
If your children’s school is unwilling to work with you to resolve the problem, look at the educational choices parents have in your state. Parents now have more free choices than ever before, including public charter schools, limited private school vouchers or other district schools. Contact your state’s education department to learn more about your options. - Never forget, you are responsible for the education of your children.
You are the only constant from kindergarten through college in your children’s education. There is no guarantee any educational system will ensure your children’s educational needs are met; ultimately, it’s your responsibility. Don’t abdicate that responsibility to your children’s schools; delegate and oversee it. Your children’s future depends on it.
Onnie Shekerjian of Tempe, Arizona, is the mother of three and co-founder of the Arizona Parents Association for Children’s Education (APACE), a parent advocacy organization.
Reprinted from the August 2001 issue of “Parent Power!,” published by The Center for Education Reform, (800) 521-2118.