Few letters of the alphabet strike fear in the hearts of parents of children with special needs like the letters I, E and P.
Stand them alone and they’re simply letters of the day on "Sesame Street." But knit ‘em together and you get IEP, or Individualized Educational Plan, a huge parents' issues that results from the annual meetings between professionals and parents of K12 grades children with special needs.
A special education IEP specifies the services needed to meet a child’s individual challenges learning with disabilities once he or she has qualified for special education. Those services may include speech, occupational or physical therapy. Add the letter T, and you’ve got an IEPT or Individualized Educational Planning Team, which includes students, parents and professionals overseeing the implementation of an IEP.
And you thought these were simple letters of the alphabet.
Confrontational Meetings
When you mention IEP to people familiar with them, most of them will act if they just ate rotten fish. This reaction is not to the IEP itself, but to the way in which the process is often implemented. Many parents define an IEP as a dreaded yearly event where professionals tell them exactly what’s wrong with their child, instead of what’s right.
Some professionals view these meetings as the time of year when parents make unyielding and unrealistic demands of school districts.
It’s no surprise the end result is often a meeting filled with anger and defensiveness. Add the invisible line that separates professionals from parents in a cramped room with kid-sized chairs and tensions running high, and you’ve got the makings of a good ol’ fashioned educational rumble.
Most parents and professionals would probably agree that we could all work harder to create an IEP process that is more user-friendly. Would you want to have a meeting that shines a spotlight on every little flaw you have in order to get what you need to successfully go about your day?
Few of us could stand up under such glaring scrutiny, but that is exactly what many students receiving special education services — and their parents — experience yearly.
My Son's Potential
My son’s first IEP was a nightmare. I sat in a stuffy room outnumbered by people claiming to be experts about children, prepared to do battle. I talked too fast and tried hard to share all the good stuff about my son, who has cerebral palsy, to help counter the negative remarks coming my way.
The inexcusable focus of that meeting was clearly on my child’s limitations and his disability. His potential was never mentioned, except by me. I know then that I was forging new educational ground.
I’ve paid a hefty emotional and physical price for my decision to stand eye-to-eye with unyielding professionals. I remember exactly how many days it took me to recover from the resulting stress of that first IEP meeting. No parent should have to pay such a price to obtain necessary services for their child.
In recent years, my son’s IEPs have become increasingly positive experiences. Our skilled educational team celebrates his accomplishments and strengths first, before creatively addressing his challenges.
This dynamic approach requires unified teamwork, mutual respect and informed participants generously sharing information that helps children succeed. It’s easy to lose sight of such lofty goals if you’re busy defending large caseloads, legal rights and over-stretched budgets.
After a decade of advocating for my son, I recently left his annual IEP meeting armed with what he needs to be successful in the coming year, minus that kicked-in-the-gut feeling I took from those earlier meetings.
Here I sat surrounded by hard-working and talented professionals who take part in my son’s success. We shared bagels and bottled water, hearty laughter and gratitude before addressing the important business at hand — meeting my son’s special needs.
In this positive and respectful atmosphere, we created tangible results. I left the meeting energized and excited about what one dynamic team has created by working well together.
I left proud of all my son has accomplished, in spite of a disability.
I advise parents to attend their child’s IEP meeting well prepared, heads held high and a sense of humor intact, with their child’s face clearly imprinted in their minds. An IEP is nothing more than a meeting, whose real value is ultimately determined by the wisdom and vision of all those who attend.
Most parents of children with special needs have already faced far worse, and survived.
Judy Winter is an award-winning journalist on disability issues and the recipient of the 2002 Exceptional Parent Award from the Michigan Federated Chapters of the Council for Exceptional Children.