Popular culture says newborn sleep patterns settle into long sleeps after the first two or three months. When they reach 11 pounds and overcome colic, babies may sleep as long as 7 hours a night. After four months, they may sleep as long as 10 or 12 hours.
That may is an important word, though. For a baby to sleep through the night, he must be ready to cycle between deep and light sleep several times. (This is true for all humans, but babies’ cycles are shorter.) That means that every 3 or 4 hours your baby will enter a more active state which is closer to waking. When he comes up into this light stage, he may startle or cry out. Sleeping on his back makes this startle response more likely.
Newborn Sleep Can Be Unpredictable
Babies need a pattern of "self-comforting" behaviors to settle back down to sleep. These may include:
- Sucking (on a thumb or pacifier)
- "Nesting" into a comfortable position (some babies like to worm their way into a corner, where the pressure of the bed may remind them of the womb.)
- Finding a favorite blanket
Some babies are better at this than others. If they’re no good at it (like three of my children), then they get more and more upset and eventually wake up completely. That’s when the trouble starts. That’s when they need you.
Follow Instincts to Get a Baby to Calm Down and Sleep
You will hear differing advice about what you can do to help babies sleep through the night. Some doctors insist it’s important to train babies to settle themselves. Others say, "Who cares? Just be there for them when they wake."
I’ve learned two things while dealing with three non-settlers, who all cherished the notion that nursing was the perfect bedtime snack:
- Don’t sweat it, and refuse to get angry. If you’ve got to be tired, choose to be tired and content; it’s much less stressful for everyone.
- When they’re ready, they’ll sleep. Hey, when they get to be teens, you can barely wake them for anything!