In communities across the country, babies, toddlers, and preschoolers come together once a week to squeal, snatch, and shriek. Although play sessions during library reading programs and hosted by other neighborhood centers may look chaotic to the casual observer, this is actually a prime time for developmental learning and teaching kids manners, including how to share and get along with others.

EduGuide's Start magazine dropped in on one such group to play toy detective, turning up an assortment of issues.

A few moms express anxiety over safety; toys that seem OK could actually be harmful. A recall due to lead in the paint on millions of wooden toy trains made headlines in 2007. What are parents to do when they can’t trust even the honorable Thomas the Tank?

Others are worried about violence. One grandma says she has banned toy weapons in her house to no avail: “Now the kids snap together Legos in the shape of guns,” she sighs.

Nearby, Heidi Cole helps her 18-month-old daughter, Sasha, assume a nonviolent attitude toward flashcards, coaxing her to sort them rather than tear them apart. Aside from this normal baby tendency, Cole’s playtime concern is finding dollies and dollhouse families with skin that matches her daughter’s complexion. “I refuse to buy all-white toys,” Cole says. “I’m looking for diversity, not just among the toys but on the packaging. I won’t buy a toy if its packaging only shows white children playing with it. But I’ll admit, this limits us.”

Limits sound like a good idea to Maria Mainero, who lately has felt overwhelmed by the number of Teddy bears and other plush creatures collected by her kids. “Stuffed animals multiply in my house,” says the mother of 18-month-old Robert and 2 ½-year-old Sarah. “I know they’re tempting in the store, and people can’t resist giving them to my kids because of the big reaction, but every new stuffed animal just gets added to the pile and the kids don’t really do anything with them.”

Real Advice

What are some easy ways to avoid these toy traps? Start asked three experts: an independent toy shop owner, a mom, and a kid.
Bruce Weiner, owner of Toys!3 in West Bloomfield, Michigan

Most of the people who come in ask for my advice. They expect me to know everything about what’s in my store. I would hope that parents would hold all toy sellers to such high standards, but I suspect that’s not the case. People who own and work in small toy shops should be able to tell you where something was made and how safe it is. I have customers come in concerned about toys made in China. I have to tell them that 85% of the toys sold in the U.S. are made in China. We’ve gotten used to cheap goods, but sometimes a cheap toy is no bargain. Weapons? We don’t carry them in my shop. Look around — there are so many other ways to play. We do have stuffed animals, but I tend to steer people away from them. I like Webkinz because they offer two aspects of play. Each stuffed animal comes with a code that lets you log on to a website. On the site, kids learn that spending “money” has real-life consequences: If you spend all your KinzCash on clothes, you won’t have any left for food, for example.
Carol Mau, Michigan mother of two

Our oldest daughter, Kelly, never had an interest in dolls. When she was 7, we took her and her younger sister, Lindsay, to visit American Girl Place in Chicago. You should have seen the way Kelly’s face lit up when she walked into the Just Like You area and saw an Asian doll. It didn’t occur to me that one reason she hadn’t shown interest in playing with dolls was that they didn’t look like her. Now, through our adoption support groups in town and online, I’ve found websites [try DollsLikeMe.com] that offer Asian Barbies, baby dolls, books — you name it. But I think a friend of mine had the best approach. From the beginning, she bought her kids multiracial dolls so they would grow up realizing that the world is made up of all shades.
Sophia Jozwiak, 8-year-old toy connoisseur

I have 37 stuffed animals. Some of them are big, some of them are tiny, some of them I’ve had my whole life, and some are only a few months old. I don’t think you could ever have too many because you can have so much fun with them. A few of my favorite ways to play with stuffed animals are:

  • throw tea parties for them
  • dress them up in doll clothes and have a fashion show
  • use them as Barbie beds
  • dance with them
  • pretend they’re students when you play school
  • draw pictures of them and write stories about them
  • talk to them about your feelings

I also like to sleep with as many stuffed animals as I can fit on my bed. They keep me company at night, especially if there’s a thunderstorm.


Kavanagh is an EduGuide contributing editor.