As parents we want to make sure our children have everything they need to ensure they develop properly and reach their potential. Sometimes we get carried away and focus too much on material things instead of trying to fulfill their emotional needs.

This can be an especially easy thing to do with preschoolers. By the time they reach this wonderfully exciting age where they seem so curious and eager to learn, they may only have a room full of educational toys designed to stimulate their budding brains. I fell into this trap one day while playing with my four-year-old daughter. I realized that it had been a while since I had actually taken the time to really play with her. I felt like I had been neglecting her and after we had our playtime, I decided to focus on fulfilling her emotional needs more.

Here's My List of Ten Things a Preschooler Requires:

  1. Someone who actually listens to him. A preschooler babbles all day long so it's easy to tune him out. What he needs from you is confirmation that he is being heard. When he tells you a story, repeat it back to him in condensed form. He'll be happy that he's actually being heard. 
  2. Someone who stimulates her imagination. A preschooler lives in an imaginary world. Jump in and play along; you never know where you might end up. My daughter loves fairies. She made a mailbox and put it in her closet to leave them notes and drawings before she went to bed. While she slept I took her notes and left a reply--signed by the fairies, of course. The fairies encouraged her to practice her ABCs, and she cooperated happily. 
  3. Someone to open new worlds to him. The airport, a museum, even a new park or library that you haven't been to will expose your child to a new and interesting place. 
  4. Someone to model an enthusiasm for life. Find something you or someone you know is passionate about and share it with your child. Whether it's classical music, painting, writing or racing cars, any activity can be simplified to give your child an idea of why it brings you joy. Pick up on what she's interested in and show her new ways of exploring it. 
  5. Someone to break down complicated life issues to a level he can understand. Questions about God, birth, and where fish go when they die--these things are constantly on a preschooler's mind. Talking about life's mysteries eases fear of the unknown. 
  6. Someone to show her that she is perfect the way she is. Nothing can hurt a person more than being unaccepted by others. We adults don't like it when another's opinion is forced upon us, but sometimes we feel we have the right to bend and shape our children into a preconceived mold. Behavioral issues are different, but we should never try to dampen a child's spirit. 
  7. Someone to teach him how to behave socially. Give your child some examples of correct behavior when in social situations. "Please" and "thank you" should be the first few words he learns. Letting a child grow up with bad manners is setting him up for embarrassing situations. Give him a few basics to get him through. 
  8. Somewhere to find refuge. Home should be the safest place for a child, but often it is not. Any kind of arguing or uncontrolled behavior by parents can make a child feel afraid and unsafe. Make your home a loving and nurturing place for your children. 
  9. Someone to confide in. Nothing surprised me more than when I asked my daughter if she's ever been kissed by a boy, and she replied yes! I always thought that she would confide in me about issues like that, but being only four, she thought nothing of it. It opened the door to a discussion about kissing and what it means. 
  10. Someone to give him credit when credit is due. Somehow people think that children can never be right. Arguing a point and telling him he is wrong because the parent "should" always be right, gives him the impression that he is not entitled to his own opinions. Before you answer a request with a "no," take a couple of minutes to think it over. He may have a valid point, and giving him acknowledgement some of the time will make accepting a "no" from you easier most of the time.

Gift giving is not just for special occasions. As parents, we have the opportunity to give our children the gift of ourselves many times a day. And although we do our best to give our children all of life's material necessities, it is the all-important emotional ones that we must try harder to provide for them. 

Heidi Hoff is mother and the author of "The Playdate Handbook."